EDITOR’S NOTE: The results of this survey are in no way meant to be scientifically or statistically accurate. This is just meant for fun. In other words, no need to get your panties in a bunch. ?

For this year’s sex issue, the editors of The Statesman decided to revive an old tradition. For the first time in four years, we asked our readers to spill their guts and partake in an anonymous sex survey. One hundred and thirty four of you rose to the occasion. Here are the results you’ve all been waiting for.

Demographics:

Our respondents were roughly 50 percent female, 47 percent male and 3 percent non-binary/genderqueer.

Around 58 percent were white, 16 percent were Asian, 14 percent were Latino/Hispanic, 8 percent were mixed race, 3 percent were black and 1 percent identified as another race.

The majority of our readers identified as heterosexual, coming in at 67 percent. Around 17 percent of you identified as bisexual and nearly 5 percent identified as pansexual. Seven percent identified as gay and 3 percent identified as lesbian. The remaining 1 percent said you were either “queer” or “questioning.”

Almost 48 percent of you said you weren’t religious. Around 28 percent of you were Christian, 8 percent were Jewish, 3 percent were Muslim and 3 percent were Hindu. The remaining 10 percent was a mish mash of different answers ranging from “Catholic” to “Sikh,” “agnostic” to “my own religion” and even “recovering crackhead, found jesus in toast.”

Meeting Sexual Partners:

No surprise in 2019, the number one way our respondents met their sexual partners was through dating apps, with 43 people voting for that option. However; 42 of you said you met your sexual partners in class or through extracurricular activities. The third most popular way to meet someone was through mutual friends or family, which received 24 votes.

Virginity:

The median age our respondents had sex for the first time was 17. Ten of you have not had sex yet (don’t worry, your time will come.)

Body Count:

On average, our readers had around eight sexual partners. This changed slightly when you controlled for gender. Females had around seven partners on average and males had around five. Twenty-five of you have only slept with one person (so far.) One of you reported having 45 sexual partners (congrats on the sex.)

Sex Acts/Positions:

There were a couple of, shall we say, unique sex acts/positions thrown into the mix (our personal favorites include “folding deck chair,” “speed bump” and “the lotus,”) but most of you stuck to the classics.

Thirteen of you favored the cowgirl position and reverse cowgirl gets an honorable mention with seven votes. Oral and missionary tied for second place with 16 votes each. But doggystyle won in a landslide with a whopping 49 votes.

Kinks:

This question was harder to quantify. The vast majority of you said something along the lines of “BDSM,” “submission” or “dominance.” As for the rest of you, we applaud your honesty. Here were some of our favorite responses:

• “Eating ass”
• “Exhibitionist.”
• “Furry, pet play.”
• “School girl role play.”
• “Pretending i am an egyptian queen and my partner is one of many in a long line of people desperate to please me.”
• “Financial domination.”

Myths about sex:

As was evidenced by this survey, all of us probably could have benefitted from some sex education courses at one point in our lives. Here were some of the craziest myths about sex you all used to believe:

• “That virginity exists! It’s a social construct used to oppress us!”
• “That the hymen was like a sheet of paper that tore.”
• “Mastrubation too often leads to blindness.”
• “A blowjob was just a kiss on the penis.”
• “I think when I was younger, I believed that one could simply rely on saliva as a form of lubrication and that that would be sufficient.”
• “That if someone came inside of you it was just injected, not that it would drip out of you.”
• “That when aroused the penis would stand straight up, line parallel to the body.”
• “The more sex you have the ‘looser’ you get physically.”
• “You pee in girls to get them pregnant.”
• “I learned the word ‘sexy’ from Donkey in Shrek, and nobody would tell me what it meant. In fourth grade, my friend said it was when your parents sleep in the same bed, so I guess I thought it was just cuddling. I also thought babies were sent from heaven after you married your true love. I was really stupid.”
• “I used to think girls just didn’t have anything down there.”
• “If a woman eats too much calcium she can get pregnant.”

Culture and sex:

Not to get all Freudian on you but, the way we were raised definitely plays a huge role in how we view sex. Here’s how our readers said that their cultural upbringing impacted their beliefs about sex:

• “I was brought up to believe that you HAD to wait until you were married to have sex and that sex was something God wanted you to only have with one person for your whole life and if you did otherwise you would go to hell.”
• “I grew up in a non-religious, liberal environment viewing it casually; I’ve come now to view that mentality however as naive. Casual sex and libertarian approaches to sex undermine the romantic bonds important to maintaining social cohesion.”
• “I think because i had family that were pregnant teens, my mom pushed for birth control when she found out i was sexually active. Other than that sex was not talked about at all and i learned about it from sex ed and on my own.”
• “Was afraid I would regret it or get pregnant even with all the caution and protection.”
• “I have a fairly open-minded view on sex. My mother is pretty hippie, do what makes you happy, etc, and that’s what I believe. It’s not something to be ashamed of, or something dirty/bad. It’s intimate (if you want it to be) or casual (if you want it that way), it can be a holy, spiritual thing, or just a physiological need.”
• “I never got the sex talk, probably because my parents are very conservative and believe in modesty, so it was something uncomfortable for them to think about. I figured it out from school, books and movies, and when I got older, I’d talk to my friends about it. Talking about it still makes me uncomfortable, maybe because it was so taboo growing up?”
• “The most sex I encountered was from american tv and movies. I’m private about my sex life. don’t share any info with anyone other than my partner. but I’m also not ashamed.”
• “Sexual activity is better in a relationship which I feel is true.”
• “The Pornhub and Brazzers culture definitely misled me and my beliefs regarding what girls liked or acted like in the bedroom. After conducting some research, I have concluded that they in fact do not ask where their extra sausage was on the pizza and then proceed to grab the delivery driver’s dick.”