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The Student News Site of Stony Brook University

The Statesman

The Student News Site of Stony Brook University

The Statesman


The Sexwolf: The new S-word

I do believe feminists around the country have taken the liberty of beating the concept of the double standard into every head and skull throughout America. We are all acutely aware of the fact society celebrates men who are wildly sexually active and shames women who behave the same.

No man would dare argue against this for fear that a feminist would jump out from her hiding place in her own armpit hair and beat him half to death with her burning bra.

Please note this depiction of feminists is not accurate. Lots of us shave our armpits at a frequency that almost borders on often and appreciate what bras do for us when we run down stairs.

Despite the fact we are all aware of this double standard, very few of us actually do anything about this oppressing view. And I believe I’m friends with all of them. Most of us, unfortunately, propagate it.

I propose that we eliminate all the s-words and w-words that can’t be printed in a university newspaper from our vocabulary and replace them all with a new term: “sexually liberated,” the sex-positive adjective described someone who has freed themselves from the restraints of society’s oppression. Whether or not this person involves themselves in other restraints is optional.

The negative words generally reserved for women who are sexually active without a significant datemate does much more than pit women against each other. It pits everyone against the idea of sex, both men and women. When society views sex as an activity men perform on women (speaking exclusively of heterosexual sex), men become the subject, treating women as the object. And so I propose the liberation of the idea of sex.

The consequences of such a simple but important change would be felt everywhere.  Sex would not be such a taboo subject anymore.  It would be something we are all free to talk about and question and enjoy. Maybe there wouldn’t be sexually-active 24 years old who have never had an HIV test because it would be ok to ask for one.

Maybe there would not be women about to graduate college who do not know where their clitoris is because they would feel comfortable exploring their own body.

Maybe there would not be 13 year olds who lose their virginity to someone much older because they would understand what was happening.  Maybe there wouldn’t be victims of date rape who are afraid to tell their story because society would stop blaming women. And maybe, there wouldn’t be celibate sex columnists.

I encourage all of you, my readers, those who read my column because I force you to, those who read it because the word sex makes you giggle, those who read it because you actually read the newspaper, and those who read it because you think I am Kathleen Valerio who works in student-health services, please change your perspective on the idea of sex.  Let’s change that s-word we call women to sexually liberated.

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