This poem, reflective of the feelings of The Konig Kolumn‘s author toward Stony Brook University’s Spring Break, appeared as a feature in The Statesman‘s first-ever Spring Break Issue.

A break is a rarity
Here at SBU.
We get days off sparingly
Not even for the Jews.

Next week is our one break
All semester long
How shall I make the most of it?
I don’t want to get it wrong

Cancun is too cliché
Boston is too cold
Even for the feast day
Of Saint Patty and his gold.

The beach could be fun
Swimming in a sea of green
Enjoying the bright, warm sun
With coeds and drunken fiends

What am I even saying?
I’m a student after all
I cannot go anywhere
The cost is much too tall.

I’m going to end up home
Watching “House of Cards”
Listening to my parents groan
“Go shovel the damn yard.”

“We saw that picture on Facebook.”
“Tell us about that girl.”
“We heard from Cousin Chase.”
Already I want to hurl.

Sleep will be nice.
There is none during the year.
Parents are just the price
Of getting out of here.

No matter what you do
With your spring break options
Please take my advice and do so
With an overabundance of caution.