I love April Fool’s Day. Everything about the holiday is a wonderful and amazing gift from the prankster Gods. Why? Because college students already do not need an excuse to do stupid, belligerent pranks to one another, so imagine what would happen if you actually gave them a reason to do it.
Personally, I enjoy the passive-aggressive pranks. The small, simple ones that sneak up on a person and smack them in the face with whipped cream. So in case you need any last second April Fool’s pranks, here are a few to keep in mind.
Glitter Bomb your enemies: Because the world is awesome and occasionally does stuff super right, there is a website out there called “Ship Your Enemies Glitter” where you literally do exactly that. This company will anonymously send a person of your choice a huge envelope filled with with glitter so that when they open the envelope, these craft herpes will explode all over everything and never leave. Hope you like glitter, President Stanley.
Change the time on your roommates alarm clock: This is a pretty cruel prank if your roomie is one absence away from flunking the course. But if they are students with flawless attendance, or maybe you particularly do not like your assigned bunk buddy, pull the plug on that sucker. It is a good prank, and maybe some of your own personal revenge for his daily 12 alarms at 7 a.m.
The Nutella poop prank: Step 1: Go into bathroom stall. Step 2: Wait for someone to use stall next to you. Step 3: Tell person next to you that you are out of toilet paper and ask to borrow some. Step 4: Place nutella on your hand. Step 5: Doing the toilet paper exchange, smear some Nutella on the other person’s hand. Step 6: Cue maniacal laughter.
Bubble wrap the tires of someone’s car: My friends and I performed this prank last year on my other friend’s Jeep. We wrapped his tires super-ninja style so nothing was extremely visible at first glance. There is even a video of him as he is pulling the car out of the lot and his expression going ghostly blank after hearing his car make a sound like 60 little fire crackers going off. 10/10 would prank again.
Put temporary hair dye in someone’s shampoo: Warning: please know what you are getting into if you do plan to execute this prank. If pulled on the right person, the prank is hilarious. If pulled on the wrong person, you may need to be on the look out for some retaliation. Make sure your doors are locked at night.
Put a bunch of parking tickets on a friend’s car: There is no heart-dropping feeling quite like running to move your car only to see Parking Authority has struck again. So why not run with this? Collect has many parking ticket envelopes as you can and stick them on a friends windshield, only instead of actual parking tickets inside, put a little note inside that says “April Fool’s!” This was actually done to me this week—only instead of it being a prank it was real, and instead of a ticket it was a boot on my car. Did you know that if you ignore parking tickets, Parking Authority will get mad? Because I sure didn’t.
Make a fake professor email and cancel class: I know plenty of professors that contact me from personal gmail accounts with class updates. All you need is a email address similar enough to your professor’s and the email address of kids in your class. This is less of a prank and more of you being the hero of the day. Think about it though: if a professor gives a lecture, but nobody is around to hear it, does anybody care?
Never underestimate the power of a rubber spider: Every guy loves to act all tough and macho around the ladies, but tangle an itsy-bitsy spider by their ear when they are not looking, and you will see a side of guys you never saw before. Or you may not see them, because there is a good chance they are running for the hills.
Put masking tape over computer mouse sensors in the library: This might a bit time consuming, but if you get some friends together, it could make for some great people-watching. Grab some popcorn and a soda and start placing bets over which kid will throw the mouse across the library first. Bonus points if you use cut outs of Nicolas Cage’s face as the sensor cover.
Just have fun: April Fool’s day is all about the observance of comedy, which should be done with laughter and stupidity. If you really want to do the day right, don’t take the jokes too seriously, but don’t use the day to make people feel uncomfortable. April Fool’s day is all about having fun, a term often forget around the time of midterms. So be safe, have fun and above all, upload every smack-cam video recording. Happy pranking!
