Everyone has their own fool-proof method for filling out their brackets. Some people choose the higher seed, while others choose the school with the cooler name. You might even come across someone who picks the team with the higher female/male ratio at the university, figuring the schools that had more girls would have happier, and therefore, better players.
But what if brackets were filled out by Darwin’s theory of Natural Selection? The question of who would win a battle between a Bearcat and a Terrier is a lot easier than figuring out who will win a matchup of Binghamton vs. Boston University.
Phil Hecken, of Uniwatchblog.com, used this method for the NFL Playoffs and finished with a 5-6 record. However, he underestimated the power of birds to beat larger animals and creatures. So without further ado, the picks for the America East Tournament.
First Round Play in Game: #8 Maine Blackbears vs. #9 Hartford Hawks
In a battle of a terrestrial giant against an aerial assassin, the advantage goes to the air attack. The swift hawk can dodge the sweeping bear claw and target a bear’s most vulnerable spot: its eyes.’ With one swoop and a carefully placed talon, the hawk can turn the menacing blackbear into a blind and stumbling buffoon.
Quarterfinals
#1 Binghamton Bearcats vs. #9 Hartford Hawks
While the hawk may have won the play-in game, he meets his match in the first round. The bearcat, a tree dorming species, that is neither bear nor cat, can hide in the trees until the hawk comes for a rest, when at that moment, the bearcat pounces using his strong tail and sharp claws to take down the hawk.
#2 Vermont Catamounts vs. #7 Albany Great Danes
This matchup pits the catamount, a large, powerful, carnivorous cat, similar to a leopard, against a Great Dane, a dog. While the Great Dane may be massive in stature, it is known to be a gentle giant. The catamount is a born hunter, using its leaping and clawing ability to come out victorious against the Great Dane.
#3 Boston University Terrier vs. #6 UMBC Retrievers
In a battle of man’s best friend, the terrier takes on the retriever. Both animals are known to be stubborn, with the Retriever having a size advantage. In a real world upset, the retriever over takes the pesky little terrier.
#4 New Hampshire Wildcats vs. #5 Stony Brook Seawolves
This matchup pits a wildcat vs. a creature that is more unknown than the Loch Ness monster or Bigfoot. The wildcat is a feline creature, similar to the catamount. What a seawolf is has yet to be determined. Some have stated that it is a wolf-like creature capable of attacking by sea, ground or air. Because of its unknown abilities, the seawolf comes out on top.
Semifinals
#1 Binghamton Bearcats vs. #5 Stony Brook Seawolves
Once again the near-mythical seawolf overtakes the bearcat in this real world upset. The bearcat is no match for the seawolf’s multi faceted attack that nothing is known about.
#2 Vermont Catamounts vs. # 6 UMBC Retrievers
Here, the catamount easily knocks out the retriever in a matchup of a big cat vs. a small dog. The catamount is just too quick and powerful for the loveable retriever.
Finals
#5 Stony Brook Seawolves vs. #2 Vermont Catamounts
In the finals, the seawolf continues its real world upset winning a place in the NCAA tournament. The seawolf used its mythical powers to destroy the large cat, who sat in the corner licking his paws.
